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There once was a university in a distant land. It was a small, proud academy with a long history in that new country.

A famine came and austerity hit the land. The Great Committee of the university had planned for a rich harvest of fresh young minds to enter its halls. But the forecasts were awry. The members of the Committee were false prophets.

Then, behold, a foreign plague descended upon the land. Darkness and gloom were upon the face of the entire realm. The plague too spoiled the Committee’s plan. “We must erect a totem to lift the curse!” And from its hidden shroud, a totem did appear.

Then it came to pass that The Leader announced a great debt had befallen the hallowed place of learning. “It caught us by surprise”, he protested. “What shall we do?” From the High Tower came the reply: “Exhort the academics to leave of their own free will. Above all, we must be kind… before, sadly, the ax does fall.” The axe could not, chortled The Leader, fall upon us.

The Leader himself became so overwhelmed by grief that, with a heavy heart, he bade farewell. “I am sorely afflicted and must leave on account of my indelicate health.” (In The Almighty’s infinite mercy, The Leader did miraculously recover to resume forthwith his former calling.)

The four corners of the Known World were scoured by an elite team of merry men and all manner of blandishments were proffered to secure an heir to the throne of the Academy. But lo, it transpired one was close at hand.

The High Leader, but one, of our distant land had cause to leave the seat of power. He averred he could lead his alma mater away from the precipice. A veritable prodigal son doth return.

To be sure, a portly fellow of no great bookish learning, but imbued with rodent-like cunning absorbed from internecine battles in the corridors of the powerful, he wooed the hearts of the Great Committee.

On that bright summer’s day, The Leader-elect of the university was announced and his imminent ascension trumpeted.

Did I hear great rejoicing in the ranks of the alma mater, or detect nods of affirmation? I leaned forward to hear and see, but to no avail. I did see one poor fellow in the ranks of the Resources of the Human, and he shed tears of joy. And I did hear the faint strains of a dirge-like song: ‘Treaty-led, rather-Red, Diversity-fed’… ‘Treaty-led, rather Red, Diversity-fed’… ‘Treaty-led…’

Only then did I jolt awake from my slumber. It had been but a disturbing day-dream. Or so I thought.

Emeritus Professor Rex Ahdar, University of Otago

4,945 views98 comments


Pooh Bah has been granted a new sports team to kick around. Brilliant former uni cafe book keeper. (Notional Chancellor Exchequer?)


Mar 05

Anyone watched the latest Q&A with Jack Tame? There we have Nationals Mental Health minister Matt Doocey actually saying that Maori are high in suicide statistics because of discrimination, stigma and colonisation! Couldn't believe my ears! (Starts at 15 minutes in. Furthermore the program starts with a long biased interview with Peeni Henare about the scrapping of the Maori Health Authority with no right of reply from Shane Reiti or anyone else.. Jack also implied that Peni would be Labour's next leader!

Replying to

Matt doocey is about to get the biggest fucking rocket this side of the black stump fair up his arse for that drivelling laden shit he spouted. Hes in my area, and by the lord himself and all the saints combined he'll wear that stupidity HARD.

keep you posted

Aaron 👍


Thou tells thy dream bravely.

You speak the visionary truth and I pray you don't lose your job.

Otago University, once that great NZ bastion of research, science and medicine; these degrees being recognized and renowned worldwide, is now reduced to being managed by someone with a Bachelor of Arts and no financial qualifications apart from putting NZ's economy into ruin.

It does not auger well and I pray some of your fellows will see the light and fight for reason.

Replying to

Heartfelt, to the point, and beautifully articulated. That's gold plated certified decked out brilliant 👏 .

Aaron 👍


Oh Lord Professor you are so eloquent and articulate.

Your magnificent fable must be published.

Those who wield the pen must disperse this tale across the land post haste.

I beg of you not avail yourself to the unrighteous "mainstream media" of the distant land for they will follow like sheep, the portly fellow of no great bookish learning with rodent-like cunning.

Replying to

ah, like vampires the msm will slink away into the night, afraid of the truth and the light.....

The prof is way too clever to sink that low, but his heart and mind are sound and clear and he knows that the truth and the light, will prevail and the 'rodent cunning' one will be ensnared in his own nest........


Couldn't help myself

Best of Fred dagg to you all.

Replying to

The glorious John Clarke. What a contrast to the pathetic Muppets who are described as comedians today. eg "Hilarious" Rhys Derby , "Funny man" Dai Henwood etc etc etc

It's reminiscent of the Emperor's New Clothes , or Pavlovs dogs. ????

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